The Tale of the Great Grandmother

Today I went on a little trip with my sister and my mum. We went to a town called Lillehammer, which lies about two hours on train from Oslo. Reason: We were going to visit my 99 year old great grandmother. I mean, nintyfuckingnine! That’s pretty amazing. And she’s so nice as well, and smart and she doesn’t even use a wheelchair. Her hearing is almost gone, and she can’t see too much, but her mind is all clear. It’s pretty awesome. If I ever get old, I hope I can get old that way.

In 1994, when I was all of two years old, Norway held the Winter Olympics in Lillehammer. It might be Norway’s proudest moment.

We were at her nursing home, and had just bought some icecreams (watermelon for the vegan) and were sitting outside. My GGM (oh hell to the yes) was a little chilly, so I offered to go grab her a jacket in her room. So I went to grab her jacket in her room. I tried to open the door, but naively thought that when it didn’t open on the first, weak push, it was of course locked.

So I went back to ask for her key, and she said she didn’t have one, and I said (or more screamed really, cause she can’t hear that good) that that couldn’t be right, cause the door was locked. And then she just started to laugh. Like, really laugh, and said that the door wasn’t locked, as if that would be the stupidest thing to think ever.

And then I went back and pushed open the door and got her her jacket. And then this male-nurse-boy-cute-guy went by, and he knew my great grandmother, so they chatted a little. And then she told him who I was, and asked “Don’t you think she’s a tall and slim nice girl?” And then I wanted to die. Just kidding. It was really funny actually, he was like “Uhm, yeah, nice to meet you,” and went on rolling an old man to the cafeteria in his wheelchair. I live on that kind of awkwardness.

I look grumpy. But I have nice clothes on. And different hair. Old picture.

So, a good day. I also got to go to this amazing secondhand store in town there, one whom my GGM had recommended me. And I bought an amazing wool cardigan in my favourite green, and a oh-so-pretty necklace and a purse. Pictures. I can’t get myself to bother with that right now. I really have to sleep. I got up earlier than on a freakin’ schoolday to reach that damned train to Lillehammer. Night.

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